Greetings and welcome to this week’s Cynspiration podcast in which I will be talking to Christina Frey about the best ways to overcome one of the most common problems faced by almost everyone – Find the Guts to Speak on Public!
‘Find your voice and inspire others to find theirs. Don’t ignore the longing to make a difference’ ~ Steven Covey.
Just the mention of it is enough to make everything clench and beads of sweat to form on your forehead, right? We almost all need to speak in public at some time in our lives; a speech at a wedding, a presentation, a sales pitch or a podcast yet the fear of having to put yourself front and centre can be crippling. It is more important than ever to be able to pitch your ideas and product in an ever-competitive entrepreneurial world in your own unique and compelling voice.
When You Own Your Voice, You Own Your Power
At the heart of anxiety, surrounding speaking in public or to a target audience is confidence. Christina says that it is our inner critic that holds us back and stops us sharing authentically. We fear being judged. We fear not being enough. We fear making mistakes. We fear our message will be ignored or ridiculed. We fear being rejected. We fear that we will stumble over our words.
‘A woman with a voice is, by definition, a strong woman. But the search for that voice can be remarkably difficult’ ~ Melinda Gates.
When we put ourselves forward, it can be quite threatening to ourselves and others. We crave approval from those closest to us and yet they can find it disconcerting to look at us in a different light. They (and we) have a psychological schema in place about who we are, how we behave and our place in the world and this can compel us to subdue and suppress our voices to maintain the status quo, even as adults. When we put ourselves forward to speak to others in a business capacity, we present as experts or knowledgable but are we feeling that inside?
Christina explains the psychology surrounding the fear of speaking out: [05:05]
What can we do to find our voice, claim our space and speak with confidence?
Speak For Success
‘All the great speakers were bad speakers at first’ ` Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Everyone starts from the same baseline when it comes to personal presentations and even the most charismatic speakers such as Tony Robbins did not always have a commanding presence and compelling delivery – they had to learn and practice too! Listen in to Christina give her best advice to get you to speaking for success and facing forwards on your journey as a confident person and successful entrepreneur.
Get into the Right Mindset
- Acknowledging Your Limiting Beliefs (19:36)
- Find Your Message (20:10)
- Observe As Many Public Speakers As You Can (22:35)
- Join A Public Speaking Class Or Group (23:25)
- Make Use Of All the Free Information Available Online (26:22)
Get Ready To Deliver
- Don’t allow being self-conscious to hold you back (27:15)
- Talking to the Man (or Woman) In The Mirror (28:00)
- Listen To and Love The Sound Of Your Voice (28:26)
- Breath (28:40)
- Avoid Stimulants Before Your Talk/Video (28:56)
- Wear Comfortable Clothes (30:25)
- Take Time To Prepare (31:01)
- Enjoy Audience Feedback and Acknowledge Your Success (35:39)
‘When you speak about something you passionately care about, you will be more comfortable and more confident in your element’ ~ Brian Tracy.
You’ve Got This!
Public speaking is a gift though it can feel like an ordeal when you are first starting. It allows you to share your energy and ideas with your target audience, add value to the world with your ideas and business and in return, gain confidence, take chances, expand your skills set and vocabulary and build your courage.
Christina says that TED talks were very educational and inspirational for her in terms of learning how to present in public and recommends explicitly Mel Robbins, Les Brown and Tony Robbins. Modelling yourself on these very successful speakers is a great way to boost your confidence and to help you get started but always remember that even these giants started small.
You have so much more to gain than to lose by singing your message out loud and clear. If others can do it, then so can you!
“Practice, practice, practice in speaking before an audience will tend to remove all fear of audiences, just as practice in swimming will lead to confidence and facility in the water. You must learn to speak by speaking.” ~ Dale Carnegie.
Christina Frey is a successful public speaking coach and entrepreneur. Born and raised in Germany, Christina was a shy but driven girl with a passion for languages. She moved abroad at the age of 20 and has used her love of language to empower and encourage her to take more risks. She holds a degree in Chinese studies and speaks Chinese, German and English amongst other languages. Christina is passionate about helping others to express themselves and regularly hosts a program designed to help entrepreneurs communicate with their target audiences in exciting and effective ways.
Points to Ponder
Repetition and practice make things easier and more comfortable.
Once we can touch people with our message, then we can help them.
Fear can hurt your business. You need your voice and presentation skills as a vehicle to share your expertise and product.
Am I going to let this fear hold me back for the rest of my life?
Reconnect with your essence
Celebrate the little wins
Don’t compare yourself unfavourably. Everyone has to start somewhere!
Each time you communicate with your audience, you are affecting at least one other person, so make your message one that adds value and positivity!
Allow yourself to grow.
Great speakers are not born; they are made!